Love on some level is what we all crave; a mad infatuation, a passionate devotion, love so insane it blinds us to any of its faults. Never mind that it has the power to transform us into the most gullible of humans or into completely pathetic groveling losers or worse still, evildoers intent on getting what we want, whatever the cost. We all want to be driven to obsession only to deny we are really there.
Sorry to burst your bubble, that’s not what we have; our kind of love sees the flaws but accepts them. The kind of love that recognizes that both beauty and the beast are different sides of the same person, loving the beauty unconditionally and understanding the beast without limitations. The kind of love where we don’t have to lie to please each other, we understand that the truth is bitter but then you can’t always have sweet things. The kind of love that would make you leave your books and everything you are reading during examination period just to make a photocopy of a handout for the other person’s use, the kind of love that would make you forget your bad experiences on a journey because you know you are closer to seeing that dazzling smile, the kind of love that would make you leave your house on a hot Sunday afternoon despite being extremely tired just to spend time together, the kind of love that respects enough to forgive, the kind of love where you can’t even fight each other for too long because you would have something to say to the other person, the kind of love where you don’t even care what your friends think or say, the kind of love that would get you staying up late at night just to hear each other’s voice, the kind of love that would make you smile knowing the other person is happy even if you are not very happy, the kind of love that turns “my” problem into “our” problem, the type that would break religious barriers because at the end of the day there are only two types of people “good” or “bad”.
The kind of love where your words flow easily and without restrictions, the kind of love where you are genuinely happy just knowing that things are good between the both of you. The kind of love where you have a ‘baby’ you both joke about and the love shown and given to the baby makes you wish it was really there. The kind of love where you catch yourself getting jealous over a triviality but you know this person is still yours and you immediately discard the jealousy. The kind of love where you begin to have similar vocabulary and see yourselves in each other. The kind of love where actions actually speak louder than words, the kind of love where you have to report your shortcomings to each other because then, there is no one else that would actually understand as much, the kind of love where you realize there is no need for tagging or giving the relationship a name, the kind of love where even the most annoying person on earth is responsible for your biggest smiles and pretty blush. The kind of love where your pride stands down. The kind of love where your standards are still not let down…because he is a cave man! The kind of love where everything else comes second. The kind of love that got you breaking a few personal rules to have a good laugh. The kind of love where you just love. The kind of love where you know if you keep going on and on writing, you might never finish.
Yes this is what we have, it can’t totally be described, it has been said that the magic of love is in the belief that it would never end but nah, we are too realistic for that, the magic of ours is in the belief that even if it would end we would not have lost out while it was there. In my dear friend Ona Akinde’s words “I don’t know if I’ll always have you. I don’t know if there will come a day when all I have of you are memories, and these thoughts are enough to stop me from trying, to make me not bother and save my heart the stress, but the love that we have makes me want to risk it all, I don’t know how long I have with you, but I have you now, here with me and in this moment and that is all that really matters.”
That sums it all, these few months, we have had the highs and lows, the deep conversations and shallow ones, the best and the worst of times but if I have another chance to have those moments again I would have them again with only you. I remember telling you I couldn’t do this alone but if you would take the chance on me, I was ready to take the chance too. Lol, we have taken the chance on each other and I would do it over and over and over again… It might sound like a cliché but I don’t think there are any words that someone else hasn’t thought of to tell you how much I love you…you might say you are undeserving but then, neither am I…I am still contemplating right now whether or not to send this to you…so if you ever get this…we both know what my final decision is.
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