On last week’s edition of Tell Tale Thursday, we shared the story of a PAS Reader who is in love with a guy but they have the issue of distance between them. As if this is not enough, the guy has been acting strange to her as of late and she doesn’t know what to do. If you missed that, you can read the full issue HERE.
As usual we want to thank all those that dropped their comments, below is what our in-house-relationship writers thinks on the issue. Dear reader, we thank you for sending in your relationship issue. Kindly find below what our male and female relationship experts think of the matter:
Dear Ogechi, the first thing I can advise you to do is to ask yourself if you truly believe in the concept of love at first sight. While it has worked for some people in the past before, what most people assume is love is simply lust. That you wanted a one night stand and developed feelings for the guy could also mean that the sex was really good and he turned out better looking than you were hoping for. You need more than great sex and good looks to be truly in love with someone and the truth is no matter how busy a person is, they will always find the time to communicate.
The both of you need to consider how possible it is to make a long distance relationship work which is actually the least of your problems because from your mail, you said you didn’t get to spend much time. You need to understand and know this man well before you conclude if you are in love with him and want to be in a relationship.
Give him breathing space, talk to him as a friend since you are still both in touch but don’t bring up talks of relationships, if he genuinely loves you, he would also put an effort into making things work. A relationship takes two to make it work.
A man hardly ever falls in love from a one night stand. Even research has shown that in a friends with benefits type of relationship, the woman always ends up being the one wanting more often than not. That you had great sex with him doesn’t mean he is genuinely in love with you after all you both just wanted to shag. He might have been considering your feelings was why he decided to play along but maybe he doesn’t want to do that anymore. Try and have a frank conversation with him if you believe he is the type that would tell you the truth. That you feel you might be too clingy means he hardly makes efforts towards the relationship which clearly speaks volumes. Don’t waste your time chasing a star when you can have the whole galaxy.
Please be reminded that we do not publish the identity of those that send in their relationship problems except otherwise requested and we advise that you have only mature comments and responses to the mail as rude comments would not be approved. You can also send in your relationship issues by sending us an email via email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
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